Why Career Transitions Feel So Hard
One of the hardest parts when contemplating career change is letting go of your former career identity. We cling to the familiarity of what we know. Moving from one role into another requires a psychological shift—a willingness to step into a new version of yourself.
If you’ve been in a role for a long time, you’ll have developed a particular way of being and doing. Organisational culture, the rituals of language, the behaviours of your profession or sector—all of these shape you. Over time, you evolve beliefs, values and ways of operating that feel entirely natural.
Whether you’ve chosen to make a change or whether the change is imposed on you, both situations demand a period of adjustment and reconciliation.
Change is rarely straightforward. Even when you’ve actively chosen it, adjusting to a new role can take time. The Kübler‑Ross Change Curve is a useful reminder of the emotional stages people often move through when experiencing a major life change.
The Emotional Stages of Change
- Denial: Initial shock and refusal to accept the change
- Anger: Frustration and emotional resistance
- Bargaining: Attempting to negotiate a way out
- Depression: Withdrawal and low mood as the reality sinks in
- Acceptance: Beginning to move forward
These stages aren’t linear, and you may move back and forth between them. But understanding them helps you anticipate the emotional rollercoaster ahead.
Transitioning into an Internal Promotion
What changes when you move from colleague to leader?
If you’re considering an internal promotion into a leadership role, the potential benefits are clear: increased salary and status, a raised profile, and the opportunity to contribute to strategy and lead a team.
But the transition itself requires thought. You’ll be shifting from team member to team leader. Colleagues who once saw you as “one of us” may now see you as “one of them”. That shift alone can feel unsettling.
You may also be moving from practitioner to manager—letting go of the hands‑on work you were trained to do and stepping into a role where you organise others to deliver. Relinquishing that can bring mixed feelings.
You’ll need to consider what new skills the role demands and how you feel about leaving behind parts of your former identity.
The hidden emotional impact
It’s likely you’ll experience many of the emotional stages of change before and during the transition. Even genuine excitement about a promotion doesn’t remove the inevitable discomfort that comes with stepping into something new.
Example
Over the years, I’ve seen many people secure management posts. Despite conversations with experienced managers beforehand, the reality of the transition often takes them by surprise. It’s one thing to talk about increased responsibility; it’s another to live it. Being privy to sensitive information you can’t share, implementing decisions you may not fully agree with, and managing the expectations of a team who once saw you as a peer—all of this takes time to adjust to.
Coping With Redundancy or Restructuring
When change isn’t your choice
If you’ve lost your job, the change is not one you’ve chosen. The emotional stages still apply, but the anger and sadness you experience can feel far more acute—especially if you enjoyed your role. These feelings are entirely normal, though the adjustment period may take longer.
Financial security—whether through a new role or redeployment—can ease some pressure. But even then, you’ll be stepping into a different culture, and that too requires time to process.
If you’re applying for new roles, be aware that resentment or disappointment can unintentionally seep into interviews. This can undermine your chances, even when you’re highly capable.
Build support around you during this time. Take care of yourself by tapping into organisational employee support schemes or exploring counselling as an option, to help come to terms with the change.
Example
A connection of mine found herself in a difficult situation. She wasn’t made redundant, but her line manager made it clear clear that she neither liked nor valued her work. After many years with the organisation, she was understandably distressed.
I coached her to focus on her skills, knowledge and experience—assets she had undervalued. She began reconnecting with her network of contacts and building new relationships. Eventually, she secured a role that allowed her to grow and to escape a toxic culture.
Making a Deliberate Career Change
Why identity shifts take time
If you’re unhappy in your current job and actively seeking a new career, the transition may take longer than you expect. You’re not just changing roles—you’re reshaping your identity.
Clarity helps. Knowing what you want to move towards, why it matters, and what you need to do to get there will make the process smoother. Research, planning and understanding the practical steps involved all contribute to making a more confident transition.
How clarity helps
- Understanding your motivations will help you define why you want to make the change
- Researching what the new career requires will ensure you know what making the changes will mean
- Identifying gaps in skills or knowledge will enable you to decide how to fill these
- Building a realistic plan will help you manage the transition. Taking small steps and giving yourself permission to take time means you won’t make decisions in haste that you later regret
- Being prepared will enable to you to seize the right opportunities when they do come along
The Change Curve still applies, but acceptance becomes the dominant theme. You’re choosing the change, but you still need to be kind to yourself as you adjust to new expectations, values and behaviours.
Example
Some years ago, I chose to move from a management role—where I was unhappy—back into a practitioner position. In my case, that meant losing status rather than gaining it. I stayed within the careers sector but moved from statutory into higher education.
I spent a year researching the change and speaking to people who had made similar moves. It took three attempts to secure an offer, and each application—and the accompanying feedback—helped me refine my subsequent approaches. From my own experience, it took about a year once in post, to understand “how things are done around here” and to feel fully integrated into the new organisation. I never regretted the decision to change, but I did need time to adjust to a very different environment.
Summary: Preparing Yourself for the Reality of Change
Change is inevitable. Most of us will have several jobs throughout our lives. Some of us will change careers entirely. Many of us will work across different organisations.
Understanding the emotional and practical impact of career change can help you anticipate what’s coming and how to navigate it more smoothly. With awareness, preparation and patience, you can make the transition into a new role—or a new identity—with greater confidence.
“Your career is like a garden. It can hold an assortment of life’s energy that yields a bounty for you. You do not need to grow just one thing in your garden. You do not need to do just one thing in your career.”
Jennifer Ritchie Payette