According to Dr Tasha Eurich, Organisational Psychologist, researcher and author of ‘Insight: The power of self awareness in a self-deluded world,’ whilst 95% of people believe they are self-aware, research reveals that this figure is in reality closer to 10-15%.
What is self-awareness?
Tasha describes self-awareness as ‘The will and skills to see ourselves clearly.’ Tasha’s definition of self-awareness is helpful:
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Internal self-awareness -knowing who we are, what we want and our patterns of behaviour.
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External self-awareness- understanding how others see us and the impact we have on others- our knowledge, emotions and behaviours.
The 4 archetypes of self-awareness
1. Seekers
Seekers are low in both internal and external self-awareness. You have no clear picture of what and who you are or of what others thinks of you. You are someone at the beginning of your self-awareness journey.
2. Introspectors
You are high in self-awareness but low on understanding of the impact of your behaviours on others. For example, you may be blindsided when you don’t get the promotion you felt was yours for the taking while your colleagues may be only too aware of the reasons why.
3. Pleasers
Concerned by how others see you, you are inclined to respond as you feel others expect. You need to explore your internal self-awareness further so you don’t overlook your own values and needs.
4. Self-aware
You are one of the 10-15% of people who in possession of both internal and external self-awareness.
How can you improve your internal self-awareness?
To develop internal self-awareness, Tasha’s advice is not to spend time reflecting in solitude. Thinking about yourself isn’t the same as knowing yourself. The author cautions against asking yourself ‘why?’ questions as these don’t increase self-knowledge. They simply reinforce your own confirmation biases or move you further from the truth. For example, asking yourself:
‘Why didn’t I get that job?’ May lead to answers leading to resentment or self-loathing, such as:
- ‘That manager has never liked me.’
- ‘I’m hopeless in interviews.’
The introspection that accompanies these possible responses is disempowering.
As the saying goes: ‘analysis = paralysis.’
Instead, Tasha suggests asking ‘What?’ questions. For example:
- ‘What makes me nervous about these situations?
- What can I do that would make me less nervous?’
- ‘What could I have done differently that might have improved my chances?’
‘What?’ questions give you something far more constructive to work with and help expand your internal self-awareness.
How can you improve your external self-awareness?
Asking others for their feedback requires courage, openness and humility. Willingness to be open to others’ views is a valuable way to gain insights. Expanding your external self-awareness can really help you develop your career.
1. 360 degree feedback
You may have the opportunity to seek feedback from line managers, peers and reports. Feedback is anonymised, meaning the information you receive is more honest. Selecting those likely to provide honest and constructive feedback will be most useful to you. You’re not seeking character assassination or sycophancy. Just feedback you can engage with and explore.
2. Peer feedback
The author provides a free entry-level Insights quiz on her website. You and a friend are encouraged to complete a questionnaire. You then receive your scores and an overview of how self-aware you each are.
Conclusion
Research reveals the more senior the leader, the less self-aware they are. Perhaps few staff are brave enough to provide honest -and perhaps career-limiting feedback. None of us are 100% self-aware. We all have our blind spots. We continue to develop and grow throughout your life.
Action
For more on self-awareness, Tasha’s TED talk is worth a look.
